Articles

if God was the Blank that washed the world so clean

then I was crouched inside the carapace

Mother didn’t teach me how to slice a cucumber so thinly that you could see through each slice, a world looming misty and gentle.

chopsticks diving
deep into the bone

As a kid I remember trying
to watch myself fall asleep.
Trying to observe that precise moment
when I was no longer there.

This would be the first New Year’s Eve in their new flat, and Tanya wanted everything to be perfect.

In a Weigh Down Workshop once I was taught to recognize true signs of hunger. They taught me to stave off those feelings— with a half glass of juice and a little prayer. They said what I felt was spiritual hunger, that I must learn to be fed with spiritual food. I lost thirty-six pounds.…

Ah! That honey-baked ham.

The Old Church, on the Thames embankment, couldn’t welcome people with a blaze of lights in its porch because of the blackout regulations. Tiny slits of brightness had to guide the way.

if the kitchen reminds of us of anything, it’s that a new day always follows the last one. And, in it, the sun will rise. And then someone will need to make breakfast: fry an egg, put the coffee on, wash and dry the dishes left to soak. If we’re lucky, the kitchen is a place we go to keep ourselves alive. If we’re luckier still, it offers an occasion to be tender: with ourselves, with someone else, with the accumulating fabric of our days. There’s weight, and grace, in the way hours stack together. The work they offer us. The waiting they demand.

I drink in the morning & it is beautiful